which wound do you pick?

We just wrapped up our first week in the Niching for Hippies program.

And a thought came up for me. It’s kind of rough and I’d love your reflections on it.

We know niching is important.

We know that our most authentic niches often come from our own past wounds and struggles

We know that one of the most direct questions we can ask ourself is, ‘What have I had to overcome in my life to be where I am today?’

Here are four extremely clear and poignant examples that participants shared during our first call . . . 

“I had a nearly fatal heart attack and currently live with heart failure (the heart is damaged and cannot pump at full capacity). As a result I have had to change my lifestyle in numerous ways, and it has not been easy. That has led me to a niche of helping people to live heart healthy lifestyles to avoid what I went through, or to live with vitality after a heart attack, as I am doing now.”

I grew up in an abusive home where my parents controlled us through fear. i overcame listening to the voice of my fears and now pursue my dreams. In my work today, I support women in living according to their own truth, becoming empowered, being moved from a place of love to pursue their dream life.”

I have a son with several nuerological issues. Together we explored and implemented therapies many have not heard of. My heart is drawn towards those unaware of possible paths. In addition my own few health issues and those of friends sensitive me to those whose bodies require them to look at life differently. Also a sensitivity towards inclusion in a variety of settings…. Much more, but this is a start.”

I recovered from a spinal injury with the help of a Hellerwork practitioner, and was astonished at the positive results. So much so, I ended up taking all the steps to becoming a Hellerwork practitioner myself. Now I have much more to learn about marketing, so I can stop worrying about making ends meet and free myself to really help people.”

But what if you are like most of us and have had a lot of major wounds? 

Which ones do you pick to focus on?

As I was drifting off to sleep the other night a thought came to my mind.

“If you could travel back in time to any age of your life, to any moment or period in your life, and give yourself the gift of the qualities you most needed at that time (e.g. courage, persistence, awareness, self love etc.) which time in your life would you choose? If you had to choose ONE. If you could only go back to one point in your life, which one would you have chosen that would have had the most profound impact on your life? And what would you have given yourself?”

I don’t have an answer myself. But I think it’s a potentially profound question to consider.

Perhaps the gentleman who’d had the heart attack might have gone back and given himself a greater level of self love and self care.

Perhaps the woman who grew up in the fearful and controlling home might have given herself the gift of belief in herself, a deep love for herself and courage to speak.

You get the idea.

Once you identify the time, ask yourself:

1) What was I craving more than anything at the time? You answer to this will give you the result your clients crave most. This will help you understand how to speak to them.

2) With wisdom and retrospect, what was it that I was really needing most? This will help you begin to unpack your point of view about the journey your clients are undergoing. It will help you understand what you really need to help your clients get in order to get the results they are craving.

So, when in your life would you go back to? And what might you give yourself that would have changed everything?

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Want Help? If you’d like some more direct guidance and hand holding on figuring out your niche then go and check out my Niching for Hippies coaching program http://marketingforhippies.com/niching-for-hippies/

About Tad

  • Anf

    Tad I really resonate with this post, and I appreciate the process that you demonstrating on how to 1) hone in on your niche by 2) telling your story. I was at an event recently in Sydney where one of the speakers said something along the lines of “your greatest strength and offer comes from you embracing your greatest fear and weakness”. It truly put things into perspective for a lot of the attendees, myself included.

    To answer the question that you pose I am telling my story of how in 2006 the walls of my life came crumbling down and I ended up in hospital for 2 months, and if I think about what resources I would have wanted before that all happened it would have been to be clear about my purpose and why I was doing what I was doing, and changing it accordingly. So now I’m developing a “Determine Your Purpose” online program to help people obtain clarity and learn from my experience.

  • Zaiga

    Yes, you are right. It is a good way to search.
    I appreciate very much what you and your friends do.
    The world feels safer knowing there are people who think how to create a right order, values, attitudes… I think it is a lot about creating a new paradigm.
    I am an Artist and a coach and it seems that I always resonate to people need to be respected, when it is allowed to be who you are. Latvia where I come from is a place with dramatic historical experience of social violence. Still do not know how to call my course.
    But it seems I am getting closer already- idea about wounds helped.
    Thank you.:)
    Zaiga
    P.s. Met you in London at your workshop at HUB.

  • Hey Tad – great post, great question and for those of us who have some water under our bridge (it’s not the age, it’s the mileage) I believe it is THE question to build your “right livelihood” around. I resisted asking this BIG question for 2 decades and have only now done so. Changed my life drastically at a time when I needed it most.

    I can now see that turning point clearly
    – At the time I had no answers to what I was feeling – couldn’t even formulate the questions
    – Since then my life trajectory has taught me what I most needed to know back then … in first person experience … just like Anf in the comments below !
    – And … lo and behold … there are tens of thousands of other people out there who are where I was back in the day – now 14 years ago – wondering what to do when burnout has taken away the drive to keep practicing medicine.
    – And … now I can help. THIS me has some answers that THAT 14 year ago me was missing.

    As I plan my business to serve my people … it is clear that it is about something MUCH bigger than me. I am in service. It is completely different than any other business I have created or worked in. I hear angels singing a LOT. Amazing.

    Dike
    Dike Drummond MD
    http://www.thehappymd.com

  • dike! beautiful comments. i’ve woven them into your guest post :-)